Karen Rose asks these newlyweds what they wish they’d known before walking down the aisle...
1. Some things won't quite go to plan, but it doesn't matter
It might be hard to swallow, but no wedding (no, not even yours) will go off without a hitch. It might be that you wake up on your big day with a blemish that makes Mount Everest look small in comparison, the heavens could very well open despite it being mid-July, your flowers may wilt, the beef might be overcooked and it’s very likely that someone will end up in a heap on the dancefloor. But will you care? Not a jot!
When newlywed Abbie’s car broke down on the morning of the wedding, she was terrified she wouldn’t make it to the church on time: “I was meant to arrive in a beautiful mint green vintage vehicle. In the end, I stepped out of my dad’s knackered old Volvo but it didn’t matter, all our guests were already inside. At least it got us there on time.”
2. It’s important to spend quality time with your groom
Although the guests will be competing for your attention all day, your wedding is about celebrating your love, so do this together rather than at opposite ends of the room. “I only got one short moment with my new husband,” confesses recent bride Emily. “It all went by so quickly and I wish I’d taken some time to stand back and just take everything in,” she adds.
Even if you do plan to escape together, it can be difficult to find the time to slip away so make the most of the moments where you do get to focus on each other. “During our first dance, we didn’t even notice anybody else,” recalls newlywed Nicole. “It was the most beautiful moment and felt like just the two of us.” Other times to cherish throughout the day include saying your vows at the ceremony and the time you take out with your photographer.
3. You won’t want to pose for photos, but you’ll be thankful you did
When it comes to the photography, it’s not just the couple portraits that are important to spend time over. You should also ensure you get pictures taken with the other important people in your life. You can’t have a second run at your wedding album, so don’t miss out on those perfect shots with the people close to you. “I didn’t realise at the time, but I had lots of pictures taken with my dad and nowhere near enough with my mum,” recalls newly-wed Jane. “My mum and I are so close and it’s sad that there’s not more pictures of us together in my wedding album.”
Be sure to give your photographer a list of people you’d like to be photographed with and put a member of the bridal party in charge of rounding everyone up. You might feel like you’re spending a lot of time posing, but it’ll be worth it in years to come when you have the perfect wedding album to reminisce over.
4. You should give your dress a trial run before the big day
We’re not suggesting you nip down to the shops in your pristine white gown, but if you leave it hanging in plastic right up until the morning of the wedding, it’s unlikely you’ll be able to: a) fasten it properly, b) move around in it, and c) figure out how to go to the bathroom. “I hadn’t prepared for the size of my skirt during our first dance,” admits newlywed Heather. “All of our carefully practised steps to Nina Simone’s ‘Feeling Good’ had to be improvised as I couldn’t safely execute the pirouette turns without getting myself into a tangle!”
Recent bride Avril had a different problem on her big day: “When I tried on the dress in the shop, the sales assistant showed me and my sister how to fasten it and we thought we had it down. But on the day itself, we just couldn’t get it right. In many of the photos, I can see myself in the background pulling at the bodice to stop my bra from showing.” All it takes to prevent these wardrobe malfunctions is one afternoon spent in the house with your bridesmaids – put your dress on, walk around for a while, do a little jig and figure out the most practical way to obey the call of nature.
5. You shouldn’t let your guests have all the fun
After months – possibly even years – of planning your dream celebration, you will be surprised at how many of the finer details you won’t even notice on the day. You’ll be so busy having a good time that things like the handmade favours and elaborate table plan could escape your attention.
“I got so swept up in the excitement of the day that I didn’t remember to have any of the delicious Italian antipasti and appetisers, which I’d spent a whole afternoon choosing ahead of the wedding,” says Jane. “People still talk about how good the food was and all I can do is nod,” she laughs. To ensure this doesn’t happen to you, savour every detail of the day, taste every canapé, don’t just cut the cake; eat it! Try to take a mental snap of every special moment that happens throughout the wedding – and you can recall them over and over again in the years to come.
Oh, and another thing...
It could possibly be the best-kept secret of them all, but that romantic first night as husband and wife you’ve been dreaming about? There’s a good chance it won’t happen quite as planned. In fact, it’s more likely you’ll awake still trussed up in your dress with no memory of falling into bed at all. OK, so you might not end the evening in the throes of passion, but do make sure you organise a late check-out for the following morning to make the most of a long lie-in!
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